Boylan's affair

Where's my love? I feel...I'm ready. Yes, quite ready. The readiness is all. Who was that? Lear? Henry? Whoever. Bah, bo bee bum bo. Looks like it is time to go. She's surely ready. Yes. Yes, yes, yes. Ha and there he is. Jew wouldn't know it if he were to open the front door for me. Don't mind me sir, I have an appointment with your wife. My lover calls me, I must not say no.

Walking out of the bar, a beauty with flowing black hair distracts our villain. Black beauty. Always eager to stare at a woman's bosom, his eyes wander. From behind, his eyes can only grasp her hips. When she walks, she swings her arms, instead of her hips. She has a pretty yellow dress on. Straps hanging gently on soft smooth shoulders. Her arms swing freely, like she's the only one on the street. Like it won't matter if she collides her tiny, thin, long, bony, angular elbows into some lucky bachelor. The truth is that he'll be a quiet sensitive type but, if she's prepared to take a chance, she might just get to know the inner him: witty, adventurous, passionate, loving, loyal. A little bit crazy, a little bit bad. But hey - don't those girls just love that?

Have to get her attention. Have to see those breasts. Ok. Here it goes. Kah! ACHEW! AHEM!

And she looks back. Not that she's interested in seeing a grown man coughing up the slimy yellow stuff that's been accumulating since the last time he had the luxury of a good cough. But its gross and maybe he needs help and maybe she knows him and maybe he's dying.

But no. He's fine, and he really wanted to see the twins. If he ever had a drive to be with a woman, you could find it in his pants.

Badump! Badump! Badump! Badump! Badump! Badump! Badump! Badump!

Lord, am I there yet?!

And he is. Why knock when she would have to get all the way out of her lovely, soft warm bed. Blanket is warm. No, I'll just go in. I have my condom here. The readiness is all. I feel... I'm ready. Where's my love?

Leopold?

Try again.

That's why you're here, isn't it?

Shes looks so comfortable. But there's a good chance he could add to her comfort. He too, needs some comfort. Some afternoon delight. His shirt comes off. Now they're going to bed. Loving her is easy because she's beautiful. Doo Doo do doo.

That's it?

It's not you, it's me. I wanted to last longer too. Well, look. That was great. When are you gonna dump the ol' Jew-bag? He's nothing but a lousy loser, you know? What do you see in him? I saw him at the bar, you know the fool won't have a drink? And he believes in capital punishment. I could look for a dumber, more worthless man, but I don't think I could succeed.

She covers herself in her robe.

The door is that way, she points. Maybe you can spend less time getting out of here than you did doing the deed.